Of Course I’d be a Keatsian—I’m Full of Hearts

There are a thousand ways I say “I want you.”This is one of them.

Sometimes I think about the possibility that you’re already out there.Not searching. Just… living.Going about your days with a soft ache you can’t quite name.Maybe you don’t know I exist. Maybe you never will.But I’m here. Quietly. Open.If you’re here too, that’s enough for now.

𝑵𝒐𝒕 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒑𝒂𝒖𝒔𝒆𝒔 𝒊𝒔 𝒃𝒓𝒐𝒌𝒆𝒏.𝘚𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘲𝘶𝘪𝘦𝘵 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘶𝘵𝘦𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘸𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘦.

I spent years trying to “fix” the relationship. I worked at it so hard I didn’t see the trap:I was trying so hard to change the outside world—because I didn’t know how to handle the one I actually could control.⠀When a relationship ended, I didn’t just lose “us.”I realized I had used the intimate comfort,the…

Not a man who can carry everything.A man who can carry a moment.A “no.”A hard truth.A need said out loud.A vulnerable want.So you don’t have to be strong all the time.

𝘼𝙩 𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚𝙨… 𝙄’𝙫𝙚 𝙛𝙚𝙡𝙩 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙖 𝙩𝙤𝙤𝙣𝙞𝙚 𝙞𝙣 𝙡𝙖𝙨𝙩 𝙬𝙞𝙣𝙩𝙚𝙧’𝙨 𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙩 𝙡𝙚𝙛𝙩 𝙨𝙤𝙘𝙠. This quote means a lot to me. I have an allergy to “therapy-speak”, but this… this is the real deal. She’s describing real self-work. I’ve spent the last year learning what I think, working out what I feel, unlearning what’s not…