SettleUpples

I used to buy peace by hiding the parts of me I didn’t know how to name. I would bury my wantsuntil they disappeared—for everyone but me. If I didn’t speak,I couldn’t stumble out untruths.And my confusion wouldn’t break us. My quiet is not a request for distance,or a ploy to be cold.My quiet is…

You do the cooking? I do the cooking?You do the laundry? I do the laundry?You brush the dog? I shave the cat? Just details. What I’m after is the woman whose company makes the doings feel like the main event. A best friend who turns a Tuesday at the stove into a highlight of my…

I’ve spent years asking women for a level of depth I wasn’t brave enough to give back. I used to be the stoic one. Or, at least, I thought it was stoicism. Sometimes it’s repression wrapped up in an ego burrito. I thought that by sitting on my wants and staying “patient,” I was being…

Can a man touch his feelings? Sometimes we touch them all too well.Sometimes we don’t know how to tell. Some silence comes from peace.Some silence comes from fearthat sharing our burdens burdens her. To an outside observer,these silences feel alike.A man can become very skilledat making them look the same. One way to know may…

Some women see stillness and assume it means he’s waiting.For her. For a sign. For permission.But stillness can be motion—just internal.𝘏𝘦’𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨.𝘏𝘦’𝘴 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘴 𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘱𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘤𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘯.

𝗜𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗺, 𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗺.𝘐𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘳𝘺, 𝘤𝘳𝘺.But don’t disappear because someone else couldn’t hold your weight.You are not unlovable.You are not too much.You are just carrying more than most people ever will—and still walking. I know how that feels. I’m proud of you—Honestly, I’m proud of myself too.Frankly, you and I?…